Best smartass answers of 2006
SMART ASS ANSWER #6
It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
"What are my choices?" John asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.
SMART ASS ANSWER #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat. She said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
SMART ASS ANSWER #3
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window.
"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that read, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knew it, the bridge was right ahead of him and his truck got stuck underneath. Cars were backed up for miles.
Finally, a police car arrived. The cop got out of his car and walked to the truck driver, put his hands on his hips and said, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver replied, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."
SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
Leggy Sue 01/03/2007Categories: Slightly Smutty